Haiz.... Today Should be a very happy day for me... cause i get to see my baobei in her beautiful dress and me getting 1st in my rugby match.... hmmm..... i really feel so insecure so afraid of losing you... so afraid that today will be one of the few last times i can hug you, feel you and kiss you... i really don't know what to do......... for the first time i m scare of losing someone i love so deeply... i don't react this way in the past.. i don't know why.... sorry if i m begin paranoid but... ya... i m scare.........My mind keeps thinking.... what if you went to his house?what if you dance with him during prom...what if you guys did something and didnt tell me? what if this and what if that.... i m really going crazy soon...... How i wish u can be by my side to comfort me or something...... Really sorry if i m like that... this part of me... it is really hard to change... i m still struggling with it.... my buddy told me not to worry so much... but i just can't help it....if i wrote something that is hurting towards you, i m very very sorry... i don't mean to... beside typing out hoping that it will make me feel better, i don't know what else i can do. i feel very scare,very lonely, very cold right now. i wonder what else can i do... to make this pain away.... tears is flowing down... i can't help it..... my mind keeps thinking non-stop.. i really want to dig out my brain and leave it there till it calm down... Baby i love you.... take care and enjoy your prom and your malaysia trip... haiz hope to see you soon
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